To anyone who's ever asked me what I look like without a fringe.... / tried to physically move it.... / whatever.... there you go.
Maybe this will clear things up for you, and at least help to explain why I'm so fucking neurotic over it (this will probably only be apparent to those of your who have had the misfortune of meeting me ;) )
.... I'm so going to regret this aren't I.... But I guess it's important.....
I'll give you a brief overview of how Amblyopia has essentially utterly fucked my life over (I'd go with the less scientific name, but "Lazy Eye" brings back lots of school memories I'd rather stayed buried forever, so I tend not to be keen on it)
Let's see... so whenever I've told anyone I have zero self confidence they never believe me... but trust me I lost all my self worth years ago after 10 or so years of teasing in school XD So that's left me pretty fucked up... kinda to the extent that no one sans my family has seen the entirety of my face in.... like.... at least 6 years (oh except from at work.... but we'll get to that in due time!) :p (Trust me however much hairspray you think that took, times it by a hundred cans or so!)
So I kinda got left in this weird state of having this really long emo fringe... which was fine all the while it was in fucking fashion >_> People even called me pretty... which was nice n_n But then it went out of fashion blah blah blah so I guess I get a fair amount of flack for the hair too... But as I've said to the odd rare person who actually knows.. "I find it easier to be judged for something others perceive as my choice... rather than for something which is inherently "me""
I think I must have had about 5-6 operations over the years.... most when I was below 10 (main reason I'm fearful of hospitals) I also had one last year in June/July which.... well I can't really remember what it looked like before... might have helped :P There have also been some..... slightly more disturbing procedures... long story short getting botox injections into your eyeball with a needle a couple of inches long is bloody terrifying and really quite painful :') But I might actually give them another go soon.... I wonder if they'll let me drink before hand.
Anyway.... I could genuinely talk about this for years it's had such a monumental effect on my life ... hell it is my life... and it governs everything about my life.... I guess that's what I want to change....
... time to sacrifice looking vaguely normal or attractive in return for being able to lead a life of not having hair in my eyes XD
Time to grow up and stop being the 12 year old Hugh who used to go hide in the toilets and cry :3 I say 12.... MUCH LARGER AGE RANGE!
Seriously.... if you want to ask anything or say anything please do, it'll make me feel a whole lot less awkward about posting this if people don't just react with silence :L
And now I shall go hide under my covers and watch american dad and pretend I didn't just do this!
Okay what the hell is the point of having an iSight on the 27" iMac? The screen produces so much artificial light it messes with the contrast and I look like this....
