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forsakeninnocence snapped a picture
11.11.10 [it's 11.11 as I begin.]
The Hard Way.
So things haven't been going so well lately.
But today was great, and I'm pushing myself to do things I no longer have the energy for.
I know it's been a while but I promise, I'll try to be here at least once a week.
Much love to all,
Nicolita.
<31 commentNovember 11th, 2010
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forsakeninnocence snapped a picture
09.01.10
Dancing in September.
Oh it's September 1st!
Well that means summer is almost over, while I have little less than a week until school starts.
Trying to work on getting things in my life in control but it appears to me the more I try the more things spiral out of control.
So I guess I have to trust that I'll fly.
I'm praying for this year to be my year.
I just became so confused and depressed with life but I'm going to try and be ms. brightside and make all of my school year resolutions come true.
I'm going to do well this school year.
That picture up there.
That is the picture of pure triumph.
Today I purchased my first piece of Invader Zim merchandise.
It makes me so happy inside.
For those of you who are unaware: I'm OBSESSED with Invader Zim. Like obsessed.
It's a wallet. ;3
How was everyone's first?
I also bought an iPod touch BEFORE REALIZING THE NEW ONE HAD COME OUT ALREADY T.T
Should I sell the iTouch i just bought (3d gen.) and buy the 4th gen.?
Or keep the 3rd gen?
I bought the 3rd gen for $200 with 32 gb.
What do you think?0 commentsSeptember 1st, 2010
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forsakeninnocence snapped a picture
08.17.10
Faint.
I am a little bit of loneliness a little bit of disregard
Handful of complaints but I can’t help the fact that everyone can see
these scars
I am what I want you to want what I want you to feel
But it's like no matter what I do, I can't convince you, to just believe
this is real
So I let go, watching you, turn your back like you always do
Face away and pretend that I'm not
But I'll be here 'cause you're all that I got
[Chorus]
(I can't feel the way I did before)
(Don't turn your back on me)
(I won't be ignored)
(Time won't heal this damage anymore)
(Don't turn your back on me)
(I won't be ignored)
I am a little bit insecure a little unconfident
Cause you don't understand I do what I can but sometimes I don't make
sense
I am what you never wanna say but I've never had a doubt
It's like no matter what I do I can't convince you for once just to hear
me out
So I let go watching you turn your back like you always do
Face away and pretend that I'm not
But I'll be here 'cause you're all that I've got
[Chorus]
(I can't feel the way I did before)
(Don't turn your back on me)
(I won't be ignored)
(Time won't heal this damage anymore)
(Don't turn your back on me)
(I won't be ignored)
(No)
(Hear me out now)
(You're gonna listen to me, like it or not)
(Right now)
(Hear me out now)
(You're gonna listen to me, like it or not)
(Right now)
(I can't feel the way I did before)
(Don't turn your back on me)
(I won't be ignored)
[Chorus]
(I can't feel the way I did before)
(Don't turn your back on me)
(I won't be ignored)
(Time won't heal this damage anymore)
(Don't turn your back on me)
(I won't be ignored)
I can't feel
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
Time won't heal
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
____________________________________________________________
Terrible mood.
I'm kind of out of it.
I had a random attack today.
Or I started to.
Blah, how was your day?2 commentsAugust 17th, 2010
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forsakeninnocence snapped a picture
08.16.10
You.
You love the people that love you.
You hear the music they move to.
You give your ode to the fall through.
But you don't know you don't know you don't know you don't know.
You love the people that love you.
You hear the music they move to.
You give your ode to the fall through.
But you don't know you don't know you don't know you don't know you.
You just got off work, huh?
Another night feeling like the worst one.
You didn't even count your tips yet,
But you can tell that it ain't no big step.
I don't see why you so nice to customers
They're all fucks and low lives.
But don't fight, just keep the lip stiff
And get that money it's the weekend shift.
But why they all gotta be freaks.
Wish they would just eat and leave.
And keep they eyes to theyselves, already insecure, don't need any help.
But you can blame the pride that makes you hold your anger inside,
But deep down you wanna curse them all.
Fuck off asshole jerk off dirt ball.
You love the people that love you.
You hear the music they move to.
You give your ode to the fall through.
But you don't know you don't know you don't know you don't know.
You love the people that love you.
You hear the music they move to.
You give your ode to the fall through.
But you don't know you don't know you don't know you don't know you.
Now attitude check,
Still show up? You haven't quit yet?
And even when you're meek and sweet
They still treat you like a piece of meat. Huh.
Outrageous, each day this clock tick tock and you still a waitress.
Trying to pay them student loans
And the lights and the phone and the food and the home.
And you ain't quite broke but you couldn't afford that place on your own.
Gotta roommate, to split the rent with
Now you never feel independent.
And everything seems so hallow
Cause after work, where'd that smile go?
Better bring it back tomorrow.
Now, pick up the pace and you might make bar close.
Perfect, last call then some.
Flirtin', sexual tension.
Surfin', through them men
Cause they all searching for that bent one.
But just one to bend, and you look like you could be my friend.
With a smile like that, I gotta flirt.
Girl, you just look like you got off work.
Huh.. huh... huh...
You love the people that love you.
You hear the music they move to.
You give your ode to the fall through.
But you don't know you don't know you don't know you don't know.
You love the people that love you.
You hear the music they move to.
You give your ode to the fall through.
But you don't know you don't know you don't know you don't know you.
____________________________________________________________
<3
Life is hectic, I'm broke, and I need funds of the monetary persuasion. On top of everything else, I'm WORKING; alas I don't complain.
It's ok.0 commentsAugust 16th, 2010
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forsakeninnocence snapped a picture
08.4.10
010
I am a black hole.
That sucks the life out of everything that's there,
and goes absolutely positively no where.
I am a glass half empty.
That's half full of pessmistic thoughts that do damage,
and I'm producing them faster than I can manage.
I am a murderer.
Who has killed myself and oters internally; mentally and emotionally,
and honestly completely, unintentionally.
I am a human being.
Who has made a million and one mistakes that I have not forgiven myself for,
and who will make a million and one more.
____________________________________________________________
Had an off day at work today.
And now I just found out my brothers aren't coming over.
I have therapy tomorrow morning.
That up there above the line is a poem I wrote.
Thoughts?4 commentsAugust 4th, 2010
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forsakeninnocence snapped a picture
8.2.10
All The Way Turned Up
Oy vey, it's been a while, no?
Summer is half way over and I have nothing exciting to tell you.
I went to New Hampshire, kinda got a job, saw three movies [so far] whicch were, Toy Story 3D, Eclipse, and Inception, which I just saw last night.
They were all amazing.
I went to the mall a few times [Queens Center and Atlantic]
Had two bbq's [one for July 5th and one for my parent's anniversary].
And I got my nails done.
Today I went to register to retake the regents. Which is in two weeks.
So I'll be retaking Geometry and Chemistry.
Oy vey, half of my summer is gone entirely, I hope the future holds more instore.
Work is really fun, I'm a day camp counselor.
My co-workers are cool, and I adore the kids.
So why isn't life good right now?
On the phone with Caroline or at least I was when I took the picture), but what else is new?
We're both really depressed, but we're trying to keep our happy up.0 commentsAugust 2nd, 2010
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forsakeninnocence snapped a picture
06.29.10
I don't wanna be me
I Don't Wanna be
I Don't Wanna be me
I Don't Wanna be me anymore
Ever throwing at his home
Two glass houses, twenty stones
Fourteen yellow, six are blue
Could it be worse.....quite doubtful
I Don't Wanna be
I Don't Wanna be me
I Don't Wanna be me anymore
I Don't Wanna be
I Don't Wanna be me
I Don't Wanna be me anymore
Two steps forward, three steps back
Without warning, heart attack
He fell asleep in the snow
Never woke up, died alone
I Don't Wanna be
I Don't Wanna be me
I Don't Wanna be me anymore
I Don't Wanna be
I Don't Wanna be me
I Don't Wanna be me anymore
Please don't dress in black
When you're at his wake
Don't go there to mourn
But to celebrate
____________________________________________________________
Hey you guys.
Today is the first official day of summer vacation and I went to a volunteering thingy since I didn't get a fucking job.
84.69 average didn't help my transcript and neither will 90's next year but fuck it.
I'm on the phone with my best friend Cara.
We're both depressed but we're trying to keep our happy up.0 commentsJune 29th, 2010
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forsakeninnocence snapped a picture
06.20.10
Light Up
Ive been up for 4 days
Getting money both ways
Dirty and clean, I could use a glass of cold spades
Rolexes, chauffeurs, and low fades
I keep thinking how young can you die from old age
The always tell me no one is working as hard as you
And even though I laugh it off man its probably true
Cuz while all of my closest friends out partying
Im just here making all the music that they party too
But party on, party on, all night n-gga
I got these new rappers nervous prom night n-gga
I grow tired of these f-cking grown man liars
Story tellers, they aint even need a camp fire
Uhh, but I just wanna tell the truth
Before one of these haters load a couple shells and shoot
This sh-t feel like when fredro star was a sunset park stunting hard in his yellow goose
Ya, and ima motherf-cking missed target
But a target none the less, and I just started
Was that directed at Moi?
Cant be, they must be talking to themselves Hov, hands free
Yeah, and im just filling up this daily planner
Getting busy cuz im a star, no spangled banner
Jealous dudes get to talking in their music
And I just say I wrote it for yo girlfriends Kelsey Grammar
Yah, that’s what life becomes when you doing you
Welcome to Hollywood don’t let this town ruin you
And if you pillow talking with the women that are screwing you
Just know that she gon tell another n-gga when she through with you
Don’t get impatient when it takes to long
And drink it all even when it taste too strong yeah
I gotta feel alive, even if it kills me
Promise to always give you me, the real me
Who would have thought
I’d be caught in this life?
Let’s celebrate with a toast
And get lost in tonight
And make it all light up
(Hey, Guru, tell hom’ to go to open that Ace right there),
Wait until the sun goes down
We gon’ make this bitch light up
Even when the sun goes down
I’m gon’ make this go
OWWWWWWW, Hov turning heads like OWELSSSSS
Im the man of the hour
Triple entendre don’t even ask me how
Con-Edison Flo I’m connected to a high power
Bright lights will make your whole city light up
A trillion watt light bulb when im in the night club
I just landed in that G-450, caught the mayweather fight cuz his satellite was crispy
Uhh, yall can miss me with the money talk
The smart moneys on Hov, f-ck what the dummys talk
I don’t do to much blogging, I just run the town, I don’t do to much jogging
I aint gotta scar yet, you f-cking round with me and my dogs is far fetched
Drake, heres how they gon come at you
With silly rap feuds trying to distract you
In disguise in the form of a favor
The Barzini meeting, watch for the traitors
Uhh, and ive seen it all done it all
That’s why none of these dum dums could done him off
The summers ours, the winter too
Top down in the winter, that’s what winners do
And to these n-ggas im like windows 7
You let em tell it they swear that they invented you
lyrics courtesy of www.killerhiphop.com
And since no good deed go unpunished
Im not as cool with n-ggas as I once was
I once was, cool as the fonz was,
but these bright lights turned me to a monster
Sorry mama im promised they wouldn’t change me,
but I woulda went insane, had i remain the same ME
F-ck nggas, bitches too
All I got is this money, this will do
Who would have thought
I’d be caught in this life?
Let’s celebrate with a toast
And get lost in tonight
And make it all light up
(Hey, Guru, tell hom’ to go to open that Ace right there),
Wait until the sun goes down
We gon’ make this bitch light up
Even when the sun goes down
I’m gon’ make this go
_________________________________________________________
This song can make me feel deeply.
I don't know why or understand it.
But I just want to hear it over and over and over again.
It makes me feel when I'm empty.
And even if that feeling is sadness, it's feeling.3 commentsJune 20th, 2010
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forsakeninnocence snapped a picture
06.15.10
Lost Cause.
Your sorry eyes; they cut through bone
They make it hard to leave you alone
Leave you here wearing your wounds
Waving your guns at somebody new
Baby you're lost
Baby you're lost
Baby you're a lost cause
There's too many people you used to know
They see you coming they see you go
They know your secrets and you know theirs
This town is crazy; nobody cares
Baby you're lost
Baby you're lost
Baby you're a lost cause
I'm tired of fighting
I'm tired of fighting
Fighting for a lost cause
There's a place where you are going
You ain't never been before
No one left to watch your back now
No one standing at your door
That's what you thought love was for
Baby you're lost
Baby you're lost
Baby you're a lost cause
I'm tired of fighting
I'm tired of fighting
Fighting for a lost cause
____________________________________________________________
Learning 10 months of chemistry in 13 hours is going to be physically impossible.
Especially when I and going to be sleep for a majority of those hours.
But we'll see if I can pull through.
I hope and pray that I study.
I'm so tired my eye balls could fall out.
I've been listening to Beck all day.
I love him.
All his songs are amazing and they all have randomly creative music videos.
<3 Love him.0 commentsJune 15th, 2010
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forsakeninnocence snapped a picture
06.14.10
Devils Haircut
Something's wrong 'cause my mind is fading
And everywhere I look
There's a dead end waiting
Temperature's dropping at the rotten oasis
Stealing kisses from the leperous faces
Heads are hanging from the garbage man trees
Mouthwash jukebox gasoline
pistols are pointing
At a poor man's pockets
Smiling eyes ripping out of his sockets
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Love machines on the sympathy crutches
Discount orgies on the dropout buses
Hitching a ride with the bleeding noses
Coming to town with the brief case blues
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Something's wrong 'cause my mind is fading
Ghetto-blasting disintegrating
Rock 'n' roll, know what I'm saying
And everywhere I look
There's a dead end waiting
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Devil's haircut! In my mind!
Devil's haircut! In my mind!
Devil's haircut! In my mind!
____________________________________________________________
I love this song.
Nowadays, I don't know what I want to listen to.
Kid Cudi does make me happy.
Every since my songs got deleted life has been continuously going down the drains.
Fucked up my average.
Fml.
Oh well, once the next three days are over, I'm fucking free.0 commentsJune 14th, 2010
Nicole Davis is a 18 year old female from United States.
About
Well let's see... I enjoy everything about photography, I wish I could sing like I once could because I'm beginning to enjoy music MUCH more than I thought I ever would, I'm falling in love with dancing, everything about it. I like colors, I want to study photography, I like in New York, and I'm never happy. I'm bi, and forever single but what does that matter. I'd love to learn Hindi because I think it's a beautiful language, and I always like making new friends. Generally as long as they live some where in New York though because I would like to physically see them :D I'm a good person to talk to when you're having problems or just simply a bad day. I'm 15. :D
Following them
They're following
Books
Boy Meets Boy by David Levithan ALL TIME FAVORITE, Anything else by David Levithan, Twilight Series [No I'm not in love with an imaginary charcter I was a fan of the book when it first came out BEFORE Edward Cullen was hyped up], Gossip Girl
Music
Muse, Linkin Park, Mindless Self Indulgence, Panic! At the Disco, Arctic Monkeys, Lil Wayne, Fall Out Boy, The Killers, The Strokes, Electric Wizard, Anything off of the Queen of the Damned soundtrack, System of a Down