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I was texting someone and typed the word, "bird" wrong and it spell checked it to, "hoes." So the text woulda said, "Aww, it's like mother hoes watching baby bird take flight for the first time! Haha." Luckily I caught it before it sent.
September 11th, 2011
You can tell school has started. We had a sexual assualt today and a robbery last week ... school has only been in session two weeks by the way.
September 9th, 2011
I got a new shot glass! It says, "Take Your Best Shot In South Carolina" I have one identical to it, but it says, Kentucky, instead of South Carolina. In other news, The Packers beat The Saints! Football season is officially fucking on!!!
It's @LivingDeadNine 's birthday today! Yeah! And, my (other) friend got laid, so it's a celebration for everyone! Yeah!!! Haha. Goodnight for everyone.
September 8th, 2011
I went with my friend to the stop, this conversation happened: Cashier: "would you like to make a donation to the Alzheimer's foundation?" My friend: [long pause] "eh, no - they won't remember anyways."
September 7th, 2011
I got a new shot glass! For those who don't know, I collect shot glasses from different states. This one, however, says, 'Pittsburgh' so it's from a city instead, but it's still good. And it's a BIG shot glass so cheers to anyone who can swallow THAT entire load!
September 6th, 2011
I'm a server at a restuarant and this is a conversation between me & my co-worker: Me: "I'm thinking about asking this girl at my table if she's anorexic because she took one bite of her food and said she was full." Him: "No she's not, she's hot!" Me: " ..."
September 5th, 2011
I am now the new proud owner of a Cadillac CTS!
September 4th, 2011
All my roommates have gone kayaking this weekend so I have the house to myself. So ... guess who's walking around the house naked?! -------------------------> THIS GUY <-------------------------
September 3rd, 2011
Just got back from work. Sorry I'm not funny tonight. I have to wake up at 6AM. Fun.
September 2nd, 2011
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Bryce is a 23 year old male from United States.
I like to consider myself a great member of society: I always wear a condom when crossing the street, I say no to Girl Scout Cookies, And I stop, drop, and roll when around strangers.
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Friends, It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia, Nip/Tuck, Family Guy, American Dad, Prison Break, King Of The Hill., Archer., (After reading over this list-apparently I like a lot of Fox and FX shows. I would have never caught that)
"I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell" by Tucker Max, "My Horizontal Life: A Collection Of One-Night Stands" by Chelsea Handler, "Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea" by Chelsea Handler, "Happy Hour Is For Amateurs: A Lost Decade In The World's Worst Profession" by The Philadelphia Lawyer", "The Modern Drunkard" by Frank Kelly Rich, (Are you noticing a trend?)
I would hope I liked music because that's the industry in going into., I love most genre's of music (disco NOT included), My top 3 favorite artists are; 2Pac, Prince, and Frank Sinatra., Adam Lopez is my favorite male vocalist., I'm a singer-songwriter., I like to produce music., I can play many instruments., I started another sentence with the letter I., One day, I'd want to work in A&R at a Major Record Label., Then I want to be the head of a Major Record Label., Were you paying attention to what I just typed?
"Fight Club", "Superstar", "Virgin Territory", "From Here To Eternity", "The Man With The Golden Arm", "Some Came Running", "None But The Brave", "A Star Is Born", "Purple Rain"
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