What the point of doing anything? i mean all we do is live to die right? its not even fun in between, sure there are some fun parts and sure its all fun and games, but when the fun is all over and the misery sets in, doesn’t it make you FEEL more the the happy feeling? maybe its just me but i don’t think all the misery and suffering is worth the time and effort but thats just me.
i feel so strongly towards you even though we havent seen each other in years, and last time we left off on a bad note, i cant help but feel if i had you again everything would be alright. you see everything went downhill when you left. i did more drugs and drinking then i wanted too. i just wanted to fill the hole you left but it didnt work. i cant say i havent tried other girls because i have but i cant stay with them. i dont ever feel the same no matter how much i like them or they like me its just NOT THE FUCKING SAME! you were my everything and i fucked up. GOD i wish i hadnt done that i wish i could go back in a machine and save us the tears and heart ache. the doctor trips and the consent worry. all i want is to feel your body in my arms. its like the key for the right lock, your the key that unlocks my heart.i want to feel warm again. i want to feel safe. i want the feeling of sickness every time i look at another couple to go away. i want the consent heartache to leave me be. i want to be happy again….
i miss her and i dont even know why maybe its because i miss being with someone who really cared about me. idk. i just know is that, that time, is probably going to be the only time i will ever be truly happy and now it is over. it makes me very sad that i had to go and screw that up. i made the biggest mistake of my life loosing her and now my life will never be the same again...
Ever wonder if living life is worth it? i mean you die in the end anyways and you have like 1/100,000,000 chance of doing some thing big...
Idk
DB im depressed.
