This is what I look like on a Saturday where I have done absolutely nothing. I watched a nearly 2-hour long documentary on the Titanic. Then I laid on my bed for about two hours. I didn't have internet the entire day in my room. I didn't feel like leaving it, so I just.. Did nothing. RIght now the Titanic is on. I watched it exactly one week ago. Idk, might watch it again. It amazes me how I, by a random coincidence, ended up with a best friend in Spain. And in Odense and in Skanderborg. I just wanna see them all. Give them a hug and just.. Chill with them. Let them know that they're the best people ever. Aight. I'm out. Byeskeez.
Life is a messy thing.
But as long as I have you there with me,
to help me clean it up, I'll be alright ♥
Last night was so good. I stayed up till 2 AM for no particular reason. How crazy is technology, though? I was able to talk to someone who lives, like idk, hundreds of kilometers away. I love technology so much. I really do. I miss my best friends so, so much. But what can I do? I feel loved today and I can't describe how happy I am. I have dance practice at five. There's lunch in the kitchen. I feel very blessed, so to speak. How're you all? Because I am freaking GOOD.
This morning I awoke at 5:12 AM due to a nightmare.
I was afraid to go back to sleep, so I ended up watching the sunrise until it was 6:27 AM. Then I decided to go back to sleep. It was strangely peaceful. It was a good morning. How are you?
I have this weird daydream where I break down in school and you come to rescue me. I'm sitting in the hall. It's empty, because everyone's in their classes. You pass me. See me. Ask me what's wrong. I don't answer, I just look at you. You sit down beside me. Look at me. I stare blankly into the thin air in front of me while tears silently run down my cheeks. After a while you decide it's been enough, so you hug me. I bury my face in your chest and sob my feelings out. We don't speak. You just keep me there - locked in your arms - protected. It's the most intimate of daydreams I have about you. The only problem is.. You don't have a face. I don't know who you are. I just know that you're.. There.
I wore this to school Friday and I felt cool.
Lately I've been up and down.
I go to school happy and I return sorta happy.
I don't even know anymore.
My feelings are just.. Used to the breaking point.
I'm hoping Casper will hang out some day this week. Lately I've been finding myself in desperate need of him. I don't know. Maybe I just need to have a boy close to me right now, I don't know. He's my best friend.
I'm so fucking happy lately.
1. Remember that guy I've been rambling about for about seven months? Completely over him. Completely.
2. I have the best friends ever. And the best high school ever.
3. Yesterday I spent my lunch break lying down in a ray of sun with my friend. We listened to our mutual friend play the piano and it was just so peaceful.
4. That guy I'm over? He has a girlfriend but he's kept his friendship with me, even though he knows that I used to like him. He probably still thinks I do, because his girlfriend looks at me weird, but I honestly couldn't care less. We're still friends and I love that.
5. Because I don't like him anymore, I can now completely relax in his presence and it's the best ever. Because I want us to be friends, I really do. He's nice and funny and smart. And it wouldn't hurt me to have an attractive friend, heh.
6. I've spent more time laughing these past few days than in the past month. Maybe even a couple of months. And they've been genuine laughs, not just laughs to fill the emptiness inside me. I'm just genuinely happy right now.
I'm not genuinely happy very often. And when I am, it's only for a few hours, because then something will happen and I will disappear into depression. But not yet, this time. For two whole days, I've been happy. Yay. I'm just so fucking happy lately and I don't even care because I love being happy.
I'm in a good mood today.
One Direction has been playing for almost five hours.
I regret nothing.
Perhaps my family is a bit tired of it.
IDGAF I LUV THEM OK XXXXX
Since my last update:
1. I'm home. Been home since Sunday evening.
2. My crush/guy-I'm-head-over-heels-for, has a girlfriend
3. My friends annoy me
4. I've thrown a person out of my life
5. My days are often up and down and confusing
6. I'm feeling good
7. I have developed an unhealthy obsession with One Direction
8. Harry Styles is only 1 year, 6 months and 18 days older than me
That is my life. Sorry for not updating for a week. I have had nothing to say, really. No pictures to use ect. ect. (though this picture is quite old).
My hands smell like gloves and my legs hurt from skiing.
That is me today.
Messy hurr don't curr. #FizzyFamilyForever
If I could just move to a Swedish forest until all the snow melted, then I'd be happy. Snow and forests. These are a few of my favorite things.
