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I R BOXXY, SEEE? So basically, my theory on why boxxy always seemed like she was on drugs and was so happy, yet claimed she didn't do anything like that - is because she had just woken up from a general anaesthetic and been pumped pure O2 & hydrating fluid into her just before she made her videos.

I have this theory, because that's what happened to me today.

For a while now, I've been aware that I had a Day Clinic Operation coming up. I'd never had an operation before this one, and even though it was only something small, I was scared shitless. Scared of the anaesthetic, scared of the operation itself and scared of the pain afterwards.

I went in today, and my mum wasn't allowed with me after my name was called out in the waiting room. I had to sit, on my own, for about an hour whilst a doctor came in to talk through the procedure, an anaesthetist talked through her procedure and various nurses came in for blood pressure, temperature and filling out forms.

I was really scared - I didn't know why, because I was aware that I'd be put to sleep, I wouldn't feel any pain and all the rest. But I just was. I had to dress up in one of those mental asylum dressing gown, no underwear or clothes on underneath. I had to tape down my gig wrist band, tape down my belly bar, tape down my ear & construction bar and even tape down my new lip piercings. I wasn't allowed to drink any water after 11AM or eat after 7AM; i was starved, thirsty and practically naked.

Eventually my time came; I had to wait 10 minutes laying down, waiting to be put to sleep - nervously talking to the nurse about various things, being told I may have to take out my lip rings to stop the risk of my lip being ripped when they pulled out the face mask. However, they worked around this. I had the tap put in my arm, and she asked me what my favourite alcoholic drink was.

"Jagermeister and......" - the anaesthesist had started pumping the anaesthetic into my blood steam, and i started to feel it straight away. "and... and... and Monster" - she said; "well you're going to feel like you've had a couple of them in a moment" - i stuttered "i already do..." and she chuckled, "already!"

My eyes were heavy so I closed them, but I was still conscious. The scary experience I thought it would be turned out to be completely calming and soothing. Slowly drooping away; a wall building in my head, but the bricks were made out of pillows... slowly one by one pushing against me head.

She asked me more questions, kept me talking - and before I went to sleep she told me to think of something happy as I was likely to dream. The nurse who I had been talking to before suggested that I think about my time in Scotland and all the people I met. As that was the last thing I really heard, I started thinking about that, in particular @chris_ - and then I went off to dream.

I don't quite remember dreaming, but I remember thinking happy things... before slowly coming too - I was in a different room, I had a drip plugged in, an oxygen mask on my face and I was laughing. I just started giggling. I couldn't stop giggling. I was so happy. I felt knackered, lazy and weak but at the same time extremely happy, alert and alive. I felt really alive.

That feeling of happiness led me to text friends, led me to tell loads of nurses and doctors that I love them, led me to make some realisations. And it's what in part has led me to write this blurb, and the following things I feel I need to say to people.

IF YOU CANT BE BOTHERED TO READ ANYMORE FROM HERE ON, DONT WORRY - THEY ARE ALL PERSONAL MESSAGES TO THE PEOPLE THEY ARE AT REPLIED TO!
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@cheektv - i love you so much. through my whole depression, through all that time when i felt like i couldn't trust anyone, you were the one person i felt i could trust with everything. There have only been two occasions when i may have doubted this, and those moments were pretty much the lowest moments of my depression since I've got close to you. It really saddens me I haven't seen much or spoken to you much recently, but I put that down to my travelling. If I'm honest, it also saddens me to see you so close to other people - if I had it my way, I'd have your friendship all to myself. But your kindness, caring nature and higher understanding is exactly what so many people in our community needs. You are one of few people that really holds our community together, because you have the amazing ability to help people hold themselves together. You need to realise how strong you are, you need to see how much you enlighten people through your simple advice - once you realise how powerful, true and good you are, i think you may start feeling better about everything in your life. Your the greatest friend anyone could ask for; never forget that.

@cassg08 - I don't know how to explain our friendship. It started out of your simple admiration for me, and now it's like sometimes we're inseparable. However, I'm not stupid... this friendship might not last forever... I seem to have best friends that come and go - but I hope it does stay; because even though your a noisy, annoying and whiney woman who gets on everyone elses nerves, it is those qualities about you (and more) which makes me love you so. Behind all the alcoholic times, the big laughs and the bitching, there is a soft, caring, sensitive person. You really look out for me and it means so much. I just worry that you're getting too sucked in to what other people think of you - I know you can't help it, but just, let go. You're going places, and you know it. Admittedly, it may help you if you do try and calm down a bit... there are benefits in keeping people on your side - but never EVER jepodize your personality and who you are just to please other people. I'm sorry that you've often got caught in the crossfire of mine and mums arguments, but it's kinda good that you were there... cause i know that you truly understand that side of my life - i know you get it. i love you.

@lightscameraashlee - We talked about it all on the phone when I was in Scotland, i'm sorry that you feel things have changed so much, sorry that you feel like you've been replaced. But as I've told you, and as I'm announcing here in this blurb, you have not been replaced and you can never be replaced. We're both so busy with our own lives, we've both got things which are pulling us in complete opposite directions even though we're only down the street from each other. But never, NEVER EVER forget how close we were - because as long as you remember that, we will continue to be that close. The phonecalls every monday have been great, I want them to continue. It's great to keep up to date with you, and to be able to have that time on the phone where it's just me and you. You were the first proper friend I had after my depression start, and nothing will ever take that away from you. I look forward to doing episodes with you, making more videos, and having our own little nights together... but I'm not going to rush them... everything will fall in place with time.

@xFAWNx - I hate the distance, I hate not seeing you on a regular basis - but I know, that that was my summer, and this is now. You are an amazing human being, sometimes ridiculously silly, sometimes ridiculously cute, but generally a true friend. Whenever I'm around you I tend to just be happy. I'm really sorry that October through to early December you thought I was mad at you... no never. Back then I was quite bitter, and I was letting friends come and go because I didn't know who to trust, or what to think. Everyone around me was getting on with their lives, had more important things - I couldn't change that. But with you, you've always made sure that I am an important thing to you, despite living miles away, despite university and your full on relationship with Jerry. It's amazing to see you as happy as you are, sometimes it gets me sad for myself, but most the time it gives me hope. You've always been a big ball of light shining on my life, I do not ever want to loose you.

@wtftomcoolio - We talked about this on the phone, and a bit in my silly texts today but I am really sorry I became distant. You really fought for our friendship when you and Alex first got together, and it always meant alot to me. But eventually, it got to me... I didn't feel like I could trust alex, and I started to feel like an outsider in my own ring of friends. I wanted to trust you with everything I had... you've always only ever done good by me, you've always cared so much more than you needed to, cooked for me, provided, taken me out JUST because that's the type of friend you are. I have always valued it alot, and I have never ever intended to throw it back in your face... but on occasions I know I have. I am really saddened that you and Alex broke up - yes, I know me and him don't see eye to eye, and I'm aware that if you were still with him I probably would still be reluctant to talk as much - but you were really happy with him. When I first met you, we talked about the types of people we were... and although you have always been quite happy to embed yourself in your work and get down to it, be the guy that is mature beyond his years, I knew there was an underlying sadness in you. You had a bizzaree compulsion to try and fix me - and I was aware that through doing the little things that helped me, in part, it fixed you. I know that with you and Alex ending, that sadness will and/or has come creeping back in. But since the first time I've met you, you've met so many more people, made so many more friends and found many many people that truly value you for everything you are. You are the kindest man I have ever known, and I know for sure, that that sadness you may or may not feel right now, it will go away. Ever single one of us are lucky to have you as a friend, and whoever snaps you up next better value you higher than anything else in their life; because thats the least you deserve.

@asalariana - i'm aware that you (Asal) don't have dailybooth, but I'm probably going to link you to this picture so you can read this essay! To be honest, I don't know how I survived the 6 or so months without you. I don't intend to hurt you by saying this, but when we stopped hanging out so much - which coincidently came about the same time i split up with Mark - it was really the icing on the cake. I know I was a mess, I was snappy and I'd break out... I was also aware I wasn't going to see you as much because you had Tommy... but I always longed for you to just be there. Yeah, maybe I should of just called... but in my bitterness at the time I just expected you to understand, afterall you were my best friend. I was meeting alot of people, and getting closer to alot of people I'd known in part - but there was no one there that knew the old me, only the new fucked up emotional wreck. I really needed you. Now all this time has gone on, and after seeing you early this month, my bitterness has gone. For a while, I wasn't willing in my mind to give you another chance - but I don't want to waste the connection we had. I've never really ever had one best friend, every year or so my best friend changes. But with you, that was it.. I wanted you forever. Sometimes we piss each other off lots, but we're both on the same wavelength to always tell each other exactly how it is - therefor, any problem would be (should be) sorted as soon as its arises. I don't know what I'm getting at. But I love you, so very much. You've inspired me so much in my life, and I want to trust you and be close to you again. I realise my life isn't the same it use to be, I know I'm not going to get friday nights back, or have all of our old crew together again... things have changed and progressed... but progression is all about taking the good things from before along with the change. And you were one of the greatest things to happen to me... I need a little piece of the old, to make now feel complete.

@danisnotonfire - I've said it before to you, but, people just don't get it. tbh, people don't even believe me at all. people don't know how long we have been talking, and people don't see us as that close of friends because at gatherings we don't necessarily hang out much together. But you know, and I know, there is something. You just get everything, you understand, you finish my sentences and I finish yours. As I've stressed at you alot, I really want to have more times with you, so we can develop our own little bank of "the lulz" - but whether or not we get round to doing that anytime soon, simply knowing that you're on the inside, instead of out in the general circle of friends, that alone is enough for me to justify how strongly i feel for you. You're a great guy, and I'm so happy to see things really turning around for you. When I first spoke to you, you weren't particularly miserable, but you were saddened by things yet nonetheless full of hope. Things are really turning around now, just don't let go of it, keep on going - I'll always be here if things get wobbly!

@omgkatiex - i don't really know how to describe what i feel for you. on the face of it, i kind of hardly know you. i met you once through fawn, then by coincidence i met you again through Tom. but for some reason, you just make me happy, being with you makes me happy. I know bits and bobs about your life, and you do about mine - I understand, and I know your there and that I'm here for you. But most of the time the best therapy with you is just laughter, jokes and the lulzs. You make me so happy, I care about you so much. remember that.

@afterdarks - i've known you since my first gathering and we were instantly close. we didn't talk much outside of youtube gatherings or parties, but when we were together it was the best. if i'm honest, for a brief period last year, i questioned if i could trust you. my views on people in the community made me cast an eye on everyone and truly ask myself where they are aligned and if i could trust them. because of this, i lost alot of time with you - i myself damaged our friendship. but ever since Birmingham Gathering, slowly but surely you've proven yourself to be an extremely trustworthy friend. You may be a person from the internet, but I see you as a real person. You care about people, you're honest with people and generally you just want everyone to be happy. I love you very much and I know that I will have you as a friend for a long time to come.

@kapowyyy - how do i explain us? well, i kinda can't because there isn't really an us at the moment. but here i am to assure you that there is, and that i do still think about you. I'm so happy that you've found happiness in ashlee and other areas of your life, and I'm sorry that I'm not an active part in your life anymore. When I am around you, I do hardly hang out with you, I'm sorry that I still find it difficult to look at you and all that sort of stuff. But, believe it or not, it's only because I care so much about you. After many month reflection on everything that happened, I know that me and you are very much alike. We have both been brought up in almost exactly the same circumstances with our home/family life - the affects of our upbringings have made us quite similar in many ways. I think we have the same sort of problems in life - the loneliness, trust issues, alteregos for different people, etc. But our main difference is how we deal with the problems we do have. I tend to outpour, wear my heart on my sleeve, leaving me susceptible to further pain. You hold it in, hold on and wait till you can truly trust someone. I'm so glad you've found that person to be Ashlee and I really hope you find everything you need from your relationship. Even if I don't show it, or find it hard to talk to you these days, please remember that I do care. If you ever do urgently need me, I will never deny you. You mean alot to me, I know I can help you and you help me.

@iianardo - i know that i haven't seen you since the summer, i know that we rarely talk these days, but nonetheless, I need you to know how much it meant to me that month you spent with me. The silent days sitting in my room, hardly talking, but just understanding, just getting it! You are an amazing guy and you've been through so much in your own life, yet you put on the strongest face, you deal with things so well - even when you doubt yourself, you still deal with things. I love your outlook on life, I love your nature and I love how random and mental you can be. I really hope to see you soon, you don't realise how much I value you. I hope this will shed some light.

@nsgmusic - you are an absolute genius and an inspiration to me. i know we don't talk as often as we should, and i know that our friendship is slightly different to what I have with other people - but if it wasn't for you I probably wouldn't have developed such a belief in myself and my work. Since my depression began I've found it hard to find things about myself that I liked, but you, your occasional advise and your belief on me has kept me on track with my music. I really want to work with you, collaborate from you and learn from you. We keep organising it and it falls through - don't worry, I understand, you are an extremely busy guy and just the fact that you try to make time for me means alot. Nonetheless, I do need to get my beats down and get them down quick. You told me to set targets back in October, and my target for my album is early May - I know I can do it, thanks to you, I just need your guiding push. I owe so much to you!

@3sixty5days - we have a strange friendship, if i'm honest, at times i'm not sure where i stand with you, if i can trust you (but thats mostly down to my own paranoia). Sine the day I met you and you turned round and recognised me, whilst no-one else did, you were subscribed to me... since then, your hyperactivity, your honesty and your modesty has shown me how valuable a friend you can be, once your caught. Back in May/June I was so excited about you moving over, and thats why I started talking to you so much more. I'm sure if we lived closer to each other, we'd be the best of friends. However, stuff happened, we lost touch and all that. But the recent Skype calls, the keeping in touch, learning that you keep up to date with everything going on in the community ONTOP of your two tv jobs - well, it simply amazes me and makes me feel honoured to know you. You once told me that I was in-part a bit of an inspiration to you... you've thanked me heaps for this.. but I want to thank you too... because everything you've achieved in the last year and a half has inspired me too - it's made me see that it is possible, and that all my efforts on youtube and with my music isn't hopeless at all. I'm so happy things are working out for you, I am a little jealous (we all want success), but I couldn't think of anyone who deserves it more than you. Keep going solider!

@kirstykannibal - I've not spoken or seen you for a while, but babes, your a legend. you're another one of those people that I met at my first gathering, another one of those people that at times (due to my paranoia) i've questioned if I can trust you, but nonetheless, you've constantly proved yourself to me. I know it's shooting a long way back, but when you took me to that house party in 2008, you made my christmas 20 times better. Your constantly giving me lifts, and you'll go miles out for your friends. I do worry about you when you get low, and you seem to do it alot... but believe me, you have nothing to be low about. Your beautiful, you've got a loving boyfriend, you have a good few friends and your one of the kindest sweetest girls I know. Never forget it.

@eddplant - I have told you this, but the first time me and mark met you, I thought you hated us. For a while I was really unsure of what you thought of me. 2009 showed you to be a guy I could really get along with, but particularly the last 4 months have shown you to be one of the closest friends I could have. I know that sometimes I do things that you completely don't agree with, I'm aware that you don't understand some things about me, but nonetheless, you've always respected me as a musician and a person and that alone means the world to me. On top of that, your the one thats there when I need to dub out, or just chill out, or even, when I need to be serenaded. I'm so happy that you're finally getting the recognition you deserve, your jump in subscribers, the news of the album and the tour is all good signs that you are going to make it. And out of all the YouTube struggling musicians, your the one I'm backing the most. You've been the heart of this community for a while, and I really hope you make it. I'm really sorry I haven't seen you much recently (compared to our usual amount!)

@mark - my friendship with you truly confuses me. admittedly, we only started talking regularly again as a result of me becoming friends with cass and being brought into our little ring of friends. But nonetheless, you've always been able to make me smile. Even before we talked regularly, when it was back in July... or that odd occasion with the video call - you just make me smile. I know you feel lost, like you do nothing, but just remember that at the moment this is your down time - you will go somewhere, you will do something, your completely capable. Your stunningly gorgeous and have a heart of gold, and your sense of humour is off the hook. You have @swiftsign, who is a real catch but also, your perfect match. Stop doubting yourself boy, you have the ability to make people smile just by simply being you - that's something truly special in itself.

@ItsMrP - I don't know what's happened with us recently. Since I've known you properly, I've just wanted to be close to you. But the two occasions I have met you, it's been terribly awkward and I've felt like you're not interested at all. This doesn't make sense to me, because I remember all the skype calls, the texts and the little jokes we have. Your a little goody two-shoes who needs derailing, your sweet to the bone, hardworking and have many qualities that I could really do with. I really care about you... I don't understand why, but I do... and I will defend you to the grave. Please don't ever think negatively of me, because thats what I fear most for our friendship.

@nimbus - wow girl, i don't know what i would've done if i didn't meet you. the best people always walk into your life when your not looking, and thats you. I reckon if you and @wtftomcoolio got married and had children, you two would be the most caring, loving and perfect parents ever to exist... because you, my darling, are a true star. You care, unconditionally about people. You look after people, but barely look after yourself. It's only been a short time, but I feel like I've known you for ages. You're ability to just calm people down, breathe in and out their sorrows is completely healing in itself - and this without the massages! Never forget the affect you have on other people, because it's a true testament to the nature of your character.

@casioclark - i will always be grateful for how easily you made things feel better for me. you stuck with me through July, August, September, October despite me shooting you down... it wasn't till November that I truly started to realise that you were always there - and with two sentences you could make me feel better. I'm sorry I didn't just get things before, and I'm sorry I allowed myself to feel more than I should've. I made things complicated - but I was so sure that you could make everything better for me. And I'm sure you could! But our circumstances can't agree with that. Things have changed now. I'm not too sure what I think of you, but I will always be grateful and I wouldn't want to loose you now after all of this.

@lomasca - so, once again it's been a while. but you need to know that you mean alot to me. we certainly don't see eye to eye, and often i allow myself to fall into a state of resenting you - but you've always been loyal to me. there's been so many times in my life that you've really been there for me, when i was with mark and needed someone to understand me, after me and mark split up and various other times. there have been so many occasions in my life where you could've messed things up for me (and i would have deserved it), but you didn't. I miss going out with you, clubbing and hanging out... I don't keep up to date with you as much as I should, but I really hope your doing well and things are going good for you. Keep being a charmer, you know it gets you places <3

@robinson - you hardly use dailybooth now, so i don't know when you'll get this. but you, my friend, are the only IRL that stuck by me through it all. You encouraged me to get out, you paid for my drinks and you've always shown me a good time. I've never quite understood why you care so much about me, you've always given so much to me and not expected much in return. I'm sorry I don't come out as much anymore, but I realised that the constant drinking was often detrimental to my progress - but I'm much better now, and I do want to see you loads more. You're a true friend, you're a great laugh and I really think we should have a gaming night sometime. I look forward to seeing you soon! <3

@charlieskies - long time no talk, and to be honest you have tried to talk to me a couple times and i have been bitter and harsh towards you. to be fair sometimes you can be a little bit sly and snappy towards me - but due to our truce we've never done anything too nasty to each other. Nonetheless, I wanted you to know that I'm ready to forgive you. I've moved on now, I'm over it all. What happened back then happened back then; you were the main reason I had such massive trust issues when it came to friends - I felt truly betrayed by you, by someone I held so closely to me... so suddenly I felt I couldn't trust anyone, even the closest people to me... after losing my friendship with Asal, that kind of confirmed my doubts in my friends. But now, I'm rebuilding myself. You haven't seen me in ages, you don't know what I'm like now - but I'm completely different. Back then, you read me all wrong, you thought I was this nasty person... I really wasnt... but I was definitely naive, thoughtless and stubborn (just like you) - now I'm a much better person... Ive forgiven you - I hope you can forgive me too. You've told me occasionally about how you and @LauraMarvel miss me... well I miss you too. I doubt things can go back to how they use to be, but to be honest, nothing is the same for me anymore - but it'd be nice to hang out with you two sometime. Just chill, see how things go. If things don't work out, at least we will both know we have tried and then we can both let go and be on good terms. so, let me know <3

@dudeliawesome - i don't know whats going on, and i know you responded to my message on facebook saying that nothing was wrong, but i just feel like there is. whatever i've done to upset you, i want you to know that all i've ever done is care about you and try and help you. but at some point in november, I realised i needed to let go; i was only damaging myself and getting upset. i unfollowed you on things, unsubscribed, slowly but surely. this wasn't because i hated you or didn't want you in my life, but more because i needed to do it for my own good. every now and then, when i'm wondering how your doing, i'll check your twitter or your youtube - but this way, i don't need to see things when i'm not expecting them. i know you don't really understand how i work... i bet you roll your eyes alot when you hear the latest thing tino has done... but you must know that all i've ever done regarding you is love you and care. I'm over alot of the muddled up feelings I had, I'm over the pain - I'm aware it can all come rushing back easily... and just like with Pete... i do find it hard to look at you because you meant so much to me. I'm sorry for whatever I've done that has made you really snappy towards me, I don't know if you intend you to or not, but the comments you leave on various things like videos, photos, status-updates, etc - they do hurt me sometimes. they feel spiteful, and i don't really understand why. I don't expect you to answer all this - especially on here, but I just wanted you to know.

@alexthemagix - everything i did say to you over twitter, i did mean. however, quite quickly i realised that i should've had the decency to deal with it off twitter, and to have done it in a calmer way - less spiteful. I don't expect you to accept anything I have to say, and to be honest, I'd prefer you not to respond (unless you feel necessary) - but I don't really understand what ever went wrong with our friendships. We were great friends, unfortunately I ended up getting with a guy you like - but I was unaware of how serious you were about him - and then I made one mistake by getting it on with him in the same room as you. You certainly punished me for it, and you had a right to be mad at me - but I did feel shit because of it, and I did apologise heaps. Nonetheless, you stopped trusting me for months after. You acted suspicious of me, and didn't really let our friendship return to it's previous norm. I didn't know about you and Tom when I met Tom, and if I did, I would have never gone there... simply because I didn't want to upset you again. When you and him were together, I tried to prove to you that you could trust me, that I was your friend. But then I learnt that you had still been talking about me behind my back. I realised I just couldn't trust you.. and that hurt.. cause I don't know exactly what I did to vouch it all. You probably think this is all bullshit from your point of view - but this is what I felt through it all, and what eventually lead me to have the opinions of you which I told you about over twitter. I'm sorry I did that so publicly - but I hope this extra explination may help.

@dan_ev - you know what was said between us, and i'm sorry about how blunt and sharp it was. nonetheless, i don't want things between us to be stiff. The wednesday in London was very awkward... obviously I didn't expect you to be best buddy with me, tbh, I didn't want you to be. But the cold air, the dead stares and so on, it did create an atmosphere. I don't intend to change your opinion of me, and I don't expect that we will become friends again. But we were close once, I told you lots of stuff and I trusted and confided in you at that time with that information. I know your not a bad person - I don't think you are. I'd just like us to be able to be civil. Say hey to me when you next see me... small talk... it doesn't need to be so awkward - it's kind of unfair on everyone else. don't worry if you can't do this though, i understand i upset you alot with what i said and i completely get why you think so lowly of me. but if you can, lets both try!

@rosscoyle_ - I don't know what's going on with us. We were really close when I came up, and I thought we made up after the events of Friday night. If you can't see me the same way since then, or just don't like me anymore that's okay, just let me know. But I feel like it's such a waste, we were having such a laugh and the two days I spent with you did make me feel great about myself. OMGPOP and Photoshoots, falling asleep in odd places and One Tree Hill. You fascinate me and I don't want to loose your friendship. We have texted here and there, but you've practically disappeared from Skype and you don't really talk much at all when we do talk. Just let me know what's going on. I miss you.

@gjk - I look forward to meeting you again. Yeah, I didn't "GET" you to start with, but you are such a bloody laugh and great fun to be around. You really held together my time in glasgow; your entertaining, a complete alcoholic and a caring friend. I hope our friendship can develop despite the distance between us and thankyou for all your support and interest in everything I do!

@gingersalt - I BLOODY LOVE YOU!
@mrsgrrrg - I LOVE TOUCHING YOU UP!
@aka_damien - YOU ARE SEXY AND I LOVE YOU!
@neonbluetornado - I WILL ALWAYS CARE ABOUT YOU!
@liamsp - YOU ARE THE BEST FLIRT I KNOW!
@tikken - I MISS YOU SO BLOODY MUCH!
@lexcanroar - YOUR SO MODERN/OLDSCHOOL WHATEVER!
@someguy090 - I REALLY REALLY MISS YOU!
@itscalum010 - YOU MEAN SO MUCH TO ME, NEVER FORGET! <3
@sebastian_t - YOUR A LEGEND!
@isinclair - YOUR BRILLIANT, TALENTED & AMAZING!

@chris_ - I'm sorry i forgot your birthday and forgot to say it on the right day. We still have alot to learn about each other, but your text today about not being unsure, it made me really happy. I know things are pretty impractical with the distance between us, but for now, you make me really really happy.

OKAY IM GUNNA STOP NOW BECAUSE I WILL GO ON FOREVER - it's just alot of stuff i feel like i needed to say... alot of love which i needed to give out to people, alot of bridges i needed to build.. and alot of information i needed to clear up with people. I hope i've cheered people up, and if I have offended or upset anyone please don't declare war - just let me know.. and we'll talk about it privately... i can even edit the blurb if you want certain things taken down.

BUT YEAH!
I'm still high, and full of love.
lovelovelove....
OWH i will post more boxxy pictures in the comments below!