Jan. 12th, 2010Picture #148 out of 157
Don't mind me, just me and my girlfriend watching each other wake up on Skype. =)
It's funny being this happy, haven't felt it for what seems like such a long time. Finally having that new someone in your life, a new sort of hope, as you walk skillfully and effectively away from the tarnished ashes of the old, is nothing more than a feeling of victory.
Since I met her, every day that has ended or begun was faced with strength, confidence, and hope - rather than dread.
What kind of moments have changed your life? How have they done this, in both negative or positive ways?
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that's so beautiful,
you sound so happy :)
I don't think I've had any life changing moments in my life,
but I'm only sixteen, so I'm sure there'll be many to come (: -
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My life changing moment happened at 1:15pm on August 6th, 2009. I started talking to Melanie, and since then, I've been the happiest I have ever been in my entire life. She truly brightens every day for me.
I'm really happy for you JP. You deserve to feel that joy more than anyone else i know. -
SO smiling to see you that happy! I want you to write it down... and save this magic that real exist in life for rough moments! Enjoy every second of it... treasure ever second of it.
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@osbro..... Why are you saying so? you never know what life has for you!!
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Well JP I'll say this after I found out my ex-fiance cheated on me and I broke it off. I started to slide into a bit of a dark place. Then after meeting new friends on blog, and reconnecting with some old friends through facebook it brought me back from a very steep edge. So in a way all of you were my therapists to get me back to the way I was.
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@aislingmcgovern You will, and some of them will hurt - I can guarantee that. And especially when you kneel down and do things for people, you will know that hurt and feel like it wasn't worth it. And maybe sometimes you'll be right. But what matters more than how much it hurt, is how good victory feels.
@thechico Good for you dude, keep that up, it's something that will enrich your life in the long-run as long as you face it correctly, and learn everything you can.
@OzBro And why is this exactly? If you don't mind sharing. Because I unfortunately know that feeling too.
@DJTLaC Heh, there are other people that deserve the joy more that don't have it. I'm concerned with these people and I always will. Luckily, Tarra understands this, and if anything, she's going to help me through and through. We call ourselves not a Power Couple, but a Compassion Couple. :)
@batatakley We both have been through a lot of rough times - she has had so many terrible experiences with guys, and I inadvertently appeared as her knight in shining armor. Didn't know there was still any faith or good left in me, but she saw it when we first met (Dec. 19th, 2009 @ 7:15 pm), and in the span of a few days she let it out and showed it back to me. It was beautiful, and so motivating, you have no idea. =)
@Meaningless_Thoughts I don't claim to have the answer yet, but I do know that it's not all unicorns and rainbows around here - people can be fake, shallow, liars, backstabbers. It's complicated, but the hallmark of a grown-up person isn't a college degree or a job, or how you carry yourself or what words you speak, how much money you have or how you look; a grown-up is capable of understanding reality and taking responsibility for the things one ought to be responsible for, one of these being disciplined and upright enough to honor and respect the relationship. It is unfortunate that your ex-fiance cheated on you...but you were grown-up enough to break it off rather than stay attached and deny reality. As my girlfriend and I continue forward, we are both aware of reality and how far we are from each other, but we also know what it takes to keep things together, the compromises we must make in order to stay together, and what cannot be compromised (i.e. me flirting with other women - you may notice by DB comments aren't flirty anymore in any shape or form, or at least I try my best). And knowing that and what we must do, we take the times to realize what we share and what happened to us in each other's lives.
And from there, we can simply sit back and dream. :) And we dream on. -
im so happy and proud of u for being this happy :D. uve been through a lot and u deserve and bit of this happiness :).
there's been a few life changing moments, one was watching my grandmother slowly die and not being able to do anything...its a long story. and if its possible, its changed me in both a negative and positive way. -
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lots of moments have changed my life. All bad for the most part =/
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life's a funny thing, but everything happens for a reason.
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@Vivi1790 I've been there watching someone close to me pass away, and it is not fun. It is certainly an absolutely shocking, disturbing experience, and what a human being is supposed to make of it varies over time and with each individual. It's so strange to say this now, but watching that enabled me to realize the depth and truth of mortality, and that lesson cannot be learned by any simple life inclination, but through life vindicating our ignorance through sheer and violent force.
The fact that it was both a negative and positive affect attached to the experience - meant simply that it was real. And that's all you really have to start with.
<3
@SimplyMelissa Care to share which moments were bad? People say focus on the good, and I reply,"Fucking liars." The bad moments are those parts when there is something to learn in order to help those going through the same things.
No hero of the world nor anyone of any provident and expansive use to both our society and our earth, ever sat there just being happy for themselves. -
@CharlotteSpeaks Heh, you know what? You've been pretty much right all along. =) BTW, both me and her can't wait to meet ya, she's a fan and suches.
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I am so happy for you JP!!!
My relationship with Brandon was based entirely on skype, we used to talk for hours and thanks to that we grew stronger and stronger and here we are now 2 and a half years later happy as we can be and in 3 weeks we'll celebrate our first year wedding anniversary :) -
@jpsalamanca hmm.. I'm sure there are just under a million points I could talk about lol I think the top of the list for me is the day I took my husband back after 6 months apart with very good reason.. that single day was the worst mistake of my life.
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@vclamp My rather confused and self-destructive journey last year would have ended up in my death, for sure. I have new eyes to see the world with now, but not the same innocent and naive eyes I saw the world with as a child - it feels like I know reality within the world so much more, as well as a lesson in compassion, what can be forgiven, and what it took and takes to be someone's hero.
@Zublime75 Strangely enough, it's yours and Brandon's story and @LittlePandaExpress' and @IceFlowStudios' story that kept me hoping - the tiny little effect of your guys' relationships working out from beginning and end despite it all that it made in my heart, disproving what I was supposedly preaching before I met Tarra. I admit I was wrong about it all, but now I have a clearer understanding of how to help people stuck in the situation I was last year, particularly the numbness and loss of hope. And I promise you I'll definitely be celebrating your anniversary along with you two, you are both amazing people and such a wonderful inspiration to me. -
I love that you're happy. I'm thrilled that you're happy. I'm so happy for you for being so happy.
That said... barf at all this mushy stuff.
But I'm happy for you. Just barf. -
@SimplyMelissa LUCKY YOU THAT YOU HAVE YOUR OWN COMMENT BACK! :D
What did you learn from that mistake? If you learned nothing, then it truly was a failure. I don't know much about you but I know that if you didn't grow from such an experience, then there's nothing you can take from it, leaving you empty-handed. But you didn't - you have, despite all the insanity and pain that you were left for, a knowledge about yourself and about what you do not want in a person, that aids in defining you, and your future. And as a mother, that defines your children's future; it secures you as a strong backbone for them, and they look up to you for all your triumphs as well as mistakes - you are not a life lesson or a misfortune. To them you are the first person to bear them, to hold them, to feed them, to be there when they cry, to watch them as they grow, to speak to them when they need someone. You are their mother and they will (or BETTER BE) grateful for all you've done for them, because you took such great pains upon yourself for your own futures as well as theirs.
Tarra fell victim to a boyfriend who beat her (just texted if I can tell this story, she said it was okay, don't worry). She was a victim of cheating multiple times - I was only cheated on once. She had been mistreated, truly, whereas I was spending my life regretting much littler things I did in my past relationship(s). She went through pain that I could never fathom, never realize, nor ever experience. But then people may ask,"Why did you end up with a guy like that?" Her answer - is that it doesn't matter. Because she found me at long last. And that's what actually mattered; those experiences shaped her as a person, and despite those mistakes, it became a part of the person I fell for and I do not judge her for this, but rather, adore and look up to those trials, because in the macroscopic sense of the world, in the end she found me. And the person I met and have shared this part of my life with so far, neither myself nor she, would take back any of those experiences, because of how we feel now.
Tarra and I had a conversation about what kind of person we were looking for in a husband or wife; instead of listing what we'd want in a person to spend the rest of our lives with, we talked about what we didn't want. Despite the pain and anguish I let myself be consumed and destroyed by, many years later I re-assessed that suffering and found out that I had figured out so much about who I am and who I didn't want to be; not because I am ruled by fear or great trepidation against these things, but because I am growing a mature, defined sense of myself, of my values, of my beliefs, and of myself.
None of these teen-idol Disney rats could write a song about this. I can. And that's why I still believe I can make it through music; my age may be advanced but my technical skill and lyrical power I know cannot be matched in the way I do it and the ways I percieve things, and I intend to share that regardless of the market or what an exec tells me.
Maybe it did hurt you that much to take back your husband - but your sense of self is even greater now, without the confusion and,"What if." I believe I'm right with this.
And now you've learned everything you need to know (all I did was simply repeat it to you here, I'm no intellectual masterpiece or anything, believe me). All you must do now, is step forward. Then step forward again. Then step forward again. And again, and again, and again, and again...
After time, you'll look around and find out that negative part of life was nothing more than a step, toward something absolutely beautiful.
Keep stepping. =D -
@projectblogsphere ......
DOO DOO DOO!
DOO DOO DOO!
DOO DOO DOO!
ONE TWO THREE FOH! -
@JPSalamanca - ONE TWO THREE FOUR!!! <3
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This photo is SO homoerotic, makes me wonder where my lotion is.. .
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@jpsalamanca Thank you for such a beautiful response. I learned more than I could ever write in words when I went through that. It has been 7 years since then .. i am a changed person.. some for the good.. some for the bad.. but changed indefinately for the future. I always answer the question of "if you could go back and change one thing what would it be" with "nothing" because you're right.. all of your challenges are what make you into the person you are today and what you will be tomorrow
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@nitemareglitch It's inside my pecs.
@projectblogsphere PS I didn't know if you noticed that this is the first shirtless pic in a while. The good days are here again!
@SimplyMelissa <3 Tarra says the same thing. AND she says hi btw. :) -
i'm really happy for you :)
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@iLove_Shoes ...shutup and help me fit these tissue boxes on my feet. Mama needs a new pair of boots.
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AHAHAHAHAHA
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My life changed when I met you bestie...<3
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@Danaeatsyou Ditto bestie! <3 I miss you tons, we are the ultimate friendship!
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@JPSalamanca - I noticed, but I didn't want to jinx it by mentioning it. This is also the first picture that's really of you in over a week. DOO DOO DOO!
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@projectblogsphere I know, isn't it kinda crazy how long it's beDOO DOO DOO!
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who is the lucky lady? congrats!
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One moment that significantly changed my life was going to my first pride. I never felt more like myself in my life. :)
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@jpsalamanca Wow, I love how you worded this. I wish someone wrote something like that for me... It's nice to read such passionate writing. I thought I was only capable of such a thing.
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I'm sooo incredibly glad that you're happy, Panda Steve. (:
